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Sunday, August 23, 2009

Master's Rules


I'm so happy! Master is getting more strict. He has finally taken an interest in writing out my new rules! He already has almost a whole page filled with his expectations of me, and he says he plans to continue them and write another page for me. I'm so happy he is doing this, because I really need structure, and without knowing exactly what he expects of me, how am I to be my best submissive self for him? I love that now I will have some strict guidelines to follow. I noticed that one of the things he has decided on doing was weekly maintenance spankings. He feels I need it. It brings structure to my life. I am happy he has decided to do this for me. I made a promise to him that whatever he has written down, I will try my best to live up to those standards everyday. So I asked him not to leave anything out. I cant wait until he is done writing everything down, I will probably post a few here that seem to stand out the most.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Making Plans


I feel like I haven't updated in a while, so because of this I'm just going to write something lol. I haven't even been able to come on here and read everyones posts since I last wrote. I hate that, I love reading everyones blogs. But anyways, Ive just been really busy trying to find a job to please my Master. One of our fights was over him thinking I don't try hard enough. So I am proving to him, i am trying as hard as I can. I hope I get a call from someone soon. We also have been busy trying to think up a plan for our lives. We want to be successful, and obviously give our child luxuries once we have one, so Master has decided he is starting some college next month, and I might be too. I have an appointment with a counselor tomorrow. We have both decided paralegal would be the best fit for me. Master was the one who first suggested it to me, and I didn't have that big of an interest in it, it sounded boring. But when I talked to the counselor, she told me there are so many things I can do with it, and so many different places I can work for. But other than all of this, nothing much has been going on. Everything is pretty calm and neutral in our house. No reason for me not to obey, and no special orders coming from him. Although the past couple nights I haven't cleaned the dishes before bed, and I wonder if he has noticed. He hasn't said anything to me yet. I'm not really asking for a spanking, just his authority. But hes been caught up in his thoughts. He is trying to rebuild a 68 Mustang, and that has him all giddy. Oh, and I did start to read Fascinating Womanhood. It is a classic about women being submissive to their husband and basically just how to appreciate him more and be more pleasing to him. They say it has helped many marriages, and I don't doubt that, think about your DD or M/s relationship, you obey your Master and it makes things right. And in this book she is teaching women to obey their husband. I personally think a D/s M/s relationship is delightful, so much more intense love than just simply obeying your husband, but its a good start for every wife, and the book is enjoyable to read.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

A Common Mistake Subs Make


So today I did something very unsubmissive. I was arguing with my Master. He had called me on his way to work and was having me look for his watch that he misplaced, and I could not find it. I didn't place it anywhere and I had no clue where to look. I looked at all the places he told me to look... No watch. So I told him this, and that if he wanted me to find his watch he would need to tell me where it was. So he got all mad at me, hung up the phone, and came storming in the house a couple minutes later. So he found it, and told me that I didn't look hard enough! So of course this made me mad, and I yelled at him saying how the hell am I supposed to know where he keeps his things? I didn't put it anywhere! So of course he gets mad at me for saying this to him, because the correct thing would have been "sorry Master but I couldn't find your watch for you". Every sub makes mistakes sometimes, I'm just glad this didn't turn into a worse fight than it was. I hope next time I will be able to say the right things, because I always feel like he thinks less of me when I say the wrong thing.

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Chores


So today was a pretty good day. A nice Saturday. Master did tell me he will be writing out my rules soon, but he has been working, and much of his time this week has been concerned with fixing things during the day,and working by night. So as you can see, no time to write rules out or to update his blog. And Ive been busy helping him with everything, making sure he gets his sexual needs met and trying to make sure all my chores are done. Which a couple did not get done last night. I thought he wouldn't notice, but he did. I got tired last night, and I didn't clean the kitchen before bed, the counters were clean, but there were dirty dishes in the sink and a few things laying out. I also didn't do laundry like I should have done. But all those chores got done today of course, but Master let me know that he noticed. Before he left for work tonight, he gave me a very stern warning. He told me that the kitchen better be clean, and the laundry done when he gets home, or I will get a spanking. He says he will be able to write out my rules on his days off, and I hope so, because right now hes just been telling me things as we go. I like to see things written down. Its more final.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Needing a Spanking


Master and I had a great morning today. We lied in bed all morning with him holding me tightly as we slept in. I love feeling his big strong arms embrace me. I feel so protected by him, and it always makes me feel so submissive to him. Master and I have been getting along much better since we had our fight a couple days ago, and we are getting back into our old routines again. Ive been trying my best to be more submissive, especially since we had that fight, but since we have moved into our new home, he has not set out any new rules, and the old rules have kind of been neglected. Like hes not being as strict about our rules. I wish he would. I want him to write out new rules, and spank my ass when I misbehave. I miss feeling his firm hand on me. I need that structure. I really need a maintenance spanking from him. I want him to show me hes the boss. Its hard to be submissive all the time without having that reinforcement. He doesn't like to spank me when I've been good (unless its playful of course!) but I think he knows that if he doesn't, it will lead to me misbehaving just to get spanked. It just puts me back into reality when he spanks me, and I get so turned on when he is his most dominant. Don't get me wrong, spankings are not pleasurable for me. They hurt! But him having that authority and power over me! It just makes me want to shout fuck me! I think when he reads this tomorrow he will start being the strict Master he was once again. At least i hope. :)

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Love's Not Perfect 24/7


Master and I are back from our little vacation, and we had tons of fun this past week. But that fun soon ended when we got back home. Yesterday we finally awoke in our own home again, but the day did not go as planned. Master and I got into a huge fight. He was angry that I hadn't found a job yet, and in my defense, this was only the first day we have gotten back. It started when we were supposed to go see if I could get my old job back. He told me to get my shoes on so we could go, and I sat there, ignoring him because he was being rude and hurtful. So of course, every submissive knows that when you ignore your Master, nothing good can come of it. He got more angry, and ended up taking off in his truck. So I left too. I went to see if I could get my job back, they told me they didn't know yet. So as I drove back home I called Master to tell him to come back home, and he said some hurtful things and so did I. We were finally home together and still fighting because I told him it seemed that everything was my fault, and he blames me for everything wrong in his life. We have such passion for each other that we fight passionately and it can get intense. I lose my submissive self and yell and slam doors saying he doesn't love me. We both end the fight crying out our love for each other. Then I get a call saying I cant get my old job back. I'm so disappointed, I call and demand why. They tell me its because I got let go for unsatisfactory performance, so I cant come back. Master assures me we have plenty of money and not to worry about it, but I think to myself that if I don't find a job soon, I know this fight will resurface. So I called a temp agency and I got lucky because I have experience in something they are hiring for. I have an appointment to get all registered with them today, so i hope I come home knowing I have a job. More importantly if I do, Master will be reassured, and not stressed anymore. It will be back to the basics with him the HOH. I hate when we fight, but I guess it does have a plus side, good make-up sex. lol