Saturday, August 2, 2008

Tough Times

My master and I have been going through a tough week. Things have not been going our way at all. Seems like one thing after another. I dont want to get into detail about these things because Im not sure if someone who knows me personally would ever happen to stumble onto this page. And well, if they did, it would be a dead give away as to who I am. So I will just leave it at this. Tough times. We are so lucky to have each other when things like this happen. I dont know what I would do if I did not have my master here to comfort me. He is my everything. We compliment each other so well. And I am so grateful, and thankful that he has the patience to deal with me. We both love this lifestyle, and I have to admit, its been a little more difficult for me than it has for him. I find myself catching my tongue often, and turning to him, and ASKING him for his approval of things. Before we started all of this, I would just do what I wanted. I did not care what he thought about it. And this to me sounds selfish, and I never want to be like that again. Our love is too important to sacrifice over power struggles. We use to do this a lot, and we would end up arguing and one or both of our feelings would be hurt. He is so great. Im just happy he has patience for me, because I want this too. Its just so hard to change your ways after so many years of doing the same thing. Im surprised we have been together as long as we have while I acted that way. And sometimes I still do. But he corrects me by telling me I am not behaving and that a spanking is on the way. I hope he never gives up on me and this lifestyle we have chosen.
And another thing I wanted to talk about was our wedding.... Since the things that have happend this week, our savings that were going towards the wedding are gone. So the place we both really liked is kind of unreachable for the moment. But you know, this is okay with both of us. We dont want a big wedding. We just want to get married! We want to be husband and wife! We have been together just about six years, and we are through with waiting. We do not want to put the wedding off any further. We both think it is a great idea to just have a little wedding with imediate family and then go out to a resturant afterwards. I like this idea, and as far as I know he could care less about the ceremony. He wants what I want. Just to be married to each other finally. :)