Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Master's Request

Master said something interesting to me today. And how this happened was that I was challenging him to be my Master. Act more like my Master because he has been so lax on it lately. I did not say this in a rude way at all, and he did not take it that way either. He responded with "are you going to be my sweet submissive?" And I said, "if you be my Master". So he asked me if I could write out what kinds of things I guess I would expect of him as the Master. He said he will not follow them because he is the Master, but he is curious as to what I perceive him to be as my Master. Hmmm, he has never asked me this before, but I think he asked me this because I asked him to be more strict with me. I need more guidance from him. I don't feel like his submissive in life without his firm hand guiding me. I don't know what I will write to him, but I will post it. We definitely do not have an issue of him being his role in the bedroom of course, I just wish he would be that dominant with me 24/7. I love it!

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Always Master's Girl

So I feel like I have been missing for a while, I hate not being able to log in here, its like part of my life because no one knows about our lifestyle besides us, and other bloggers. I like being able to talk about DD things, and I love reading other blogs. So lots of things have been going on lately. Master and I are now in school, and he is trying to balance school and work, while trying to get some sleep and be my Master all at the same time! Sometimes I feel awful that he is in this position. Maybe it would be easier if I had a job? I'm still trying to find one. Master doesn't mind too much anymore now that I am in school. He likes that I can concentrate on my school work. I just don't want him to put school off because his job is more important at the moment. In the long run that job ain't shit, but he is making a good living and is able to support us.

About two weeks ago Master was really stressed with the situation and wasn't sure if he could be my Master, wanted to be my Master. I locked myself in our room and wrote him a letter as to why he NEEDS to be the HOH and my Master. And in the note one of the things I said was that our personalities, and astrological signs just are not compatible when both of us try and work equally. He is a Sagittarius and I am a Capricorn. We either complement each other, or destroy each other. He knows this from experience. We had awful fights before this. And not to mention, we both love that he dominates me. We both get off on it, theres no doubt about that. But I think one of the things that led him to think this way was because I was not being "completely" submissive. I think my actions made him self conscious about the leader he is. I would just revert back to my old habits and not listen to him and be argumentative. I don't know why I do this, it is not the person I want to be. I want to be his submissive, and I am his submissive so I need to act like it. I just want him to know that no matter what, I am always his sweet submissive girl.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Busy with Life

I know some of you are looking forward to seeing my rules posted on my blog. I'm sorry it is taking so long for me to post them. Master and I have been so busy dealing with life. We are trying to get ready for college, I'm also trying to find a job, and his brother is getting married soon. We are just way too busy at the moment. Master still needs to finish the rules, he has a page done, but I don't want to post anything until they are complete, because some of them kind of fall into each other. Its like whenever we have a free moment, we just want to relax with each other, or when we are home sometimes it seems there is just more house duties for me to complete because we were out and about all day. I hope things slow down a bit soon, Master is stressed again. Just more and more bills, and I feel like hes stressed because of me. Because I don't have a job right now. All of his worries are centered around me and my situation. He hurts my feelings about this, and when I tell him, he says sorry and that we will be okay, but its like in a couple days it resurfaces. I am trying so hard to find work, but there is only so much I can do. I almost had a job, but then the guy decided he wasn't ready to hire me yet. I don't know what the deal is, but it just let me and Master both down. We thought our problems were solved, but they are not. Not yet. So once the rules are finished and in place, i will post them. It just seems like since Master is stressed, that this has been set aside for the time being. I hope things get better. I want things to be how they were.