Busy Packing

I know I haven't been on in a bit. Less than i would like, but for good reason! We are in the process of buying our first home, and Master and I are just thrilled! This stuff is almost like a full time job in itself, and of course I have been stressing. So of course, Ive slipped here and there with my not so sweet mouth. But as things are moving more along I'm getting back on track. I also think its because I'm supposed to have my monthly visitor next week, but who knows lol. But I have been busy trying to pack as much stuff as I can because it seems everything is moving quite fast! I mean, we only started looking for a place at the end of last month, but we are very excited. We had our home inspection recently and everything went swell. Nothing major, just minor cosmetic things that need to be fixed.

So I am hoping I will still be able to update a few more times before we move, because we might be without Internet for a couple weeks after we move. Right now we have charter, and to say the least, we hate them! Just for Internet we were paying $40...then out of nowhere, slowly but surely the price crept up, and now, its about $60. And that's ridiculous just for Internet, especially, Internet that doesn't cooperate and is slow at times, and freezes up. I think the price gouge is due to them going out of business. They tried telling us that we were on a promotion, that's why it went up, but sorry for you to hear the truth, we were not. We've had their Internet for almost two years, and I don't know of any company to have a special that lasts a little over a year and a half. Complete bullshit.
But like I said, besides all that nonsense, me and Master are doing great and have a love for each other that just gets bigger every day.

Oh, and I wanted to add one more thing: Everyone please be careful with this swine flu going around, its just awful. I hope no one I know gets it.

Bad Attitude and Punishment

Tuesday night and Wednesday morning I had a bad attitude (apparently) I say this because most of the time when I give off that nasty tone, i don't really realise it, and I get defensive when Master tells me so. Tuesday night I got spanked many times with his hand (jeans on) and then with the paddle (jeans on). It hurt very bad, and I felt sore and sorry for how I acted. Then Wednesday morning I wasn't being very submissive and was questioning J. He told me this, and I got defensive, because he said I was having an attitude again, and he wanted me to be something, and I wasn't being it (submissive) so this hurt my feelings. We ended up getting into a big fight and he yelled at me for disrespecting him, and swatted me on the ass. I wish our fight had never happened. I agreed to be submissive to him. Later that day we ended up having makeup sex after a talk about me being his submissive and that this fight probably made us stronger as a D/s couple. Sometimes it is just so hard for me to watch my attitude, I don't realise the tone I use until Master gets mad. The good thing is, we are back on track and I am thinking much more before I speak. I think he is molding me into a polite woman, and I am molding him into a strong respectable man. I love him, and am happy we chose this life-style.

I miss quality time with Master

I cant wait for Master to have his days off. Today is his "Friday". We have been so busy lately because we are trying to buy a house. We have had hardly any time to just be at home and be us. Dominant and submissive. Today, since it is Saturday, we managed to have some time together, we talked about how I still have some learning to do as far as being his complete submissive, and we even had some time to have a nice sexual release. He says that this month he would like to focus on training me some more. He loves that he is the HOH and my Master, and loves when I call him by that. So I am calling him by that 24/7 now, except when we are with family/friends. Calling him Master all the time keeps me in a submissive state of mind. Reminds me that he has the authority, and needs the respect that he deserves. I use to just call him Master when I would ask him something, or when we were in bed. Sir is another favorite, but Master is what he prefers. He told me he loves the fact that he is the Master, my protector, the authority in our marriage. And he always thinks of me, always is concerned of my feelings, and I love him for that. I had him pick out something nice for me to wear tomorrow for Easter. I can't wait to wear it, because I know that's what he wants to see me in.

This is why we keep to our selves

So I was on google, and decided to do a search on DD in blogs to see if there were any other interesting blogs to get wrapped into. Well, the first thing I saw just proved to me how ignorant people can be. And it reminded me, yes, this is why we keep this to ourselves. This is why I am so secretive with my blog, why I try not to mention too many things that could give my ID away.
So anyways, I clicked on one of the first blogs I saw that popped up. It was some woman ranting and rambling about how this is the most horrible thing she has ever heard of, and basically women that are involved in this type of relationship are stupid. One of her commenter's wrote:
"This is disgusting, abusive, ridiculous, controlling, offensive, violent, sinful, unbelievable, evil...
I could keep going, but I think I have made my point.
I am furious.
I have to go for a walk now to calm down and pray for the women who have subjected themselves to this."

You know, it just kind of upsets me that people think this way, are so close-minded, talk crap about a life-style they know nothing about. You know, if they tried it, I bet they would like it just as much as us, maybe they wouldn't be on such a feminist ego trip, and who knows? Maybe their marriage would be bliss.
I wish I could go out and tell people about DD, about how my husband is my HOH and my Master, and how great it is. I wish that I could be submissive in every way, out in public, for the world to see. But I cant, because people like that would call my husband an abuser. Or say I am stupid and brainwashed. When we are about to have guests, or family over, I have to make sure I go through the house and get rid of any evidence of this lifestyle: posted rules, paddle, notes to Master. Anything. Its kind of ridiculous that I do this, but because of people like that, I'm afraid of what family and friends would say.

Some random thoughts

All is well, nothing much exciting going on here lol. The only really positive and exciting thing is that we are taking steps to be able to buy our own house soon. Owning will be so much better than renting, and we just can't wait!

I think my submissiveness is improving, I am being more agreeable with Master, not arguing or giving my opinion when he suggests something. I have just been going with it, because I trust him, and know that whatever decision he makes, is a good one. He does everything that is best for us, and would never make a decision without thinking of my needs and wants.

So anyways, besides that, I realized that I have been on the pill for five years! And to tell you the truth, I'm pretty much sick of those damn little things, have been for a while, but I am still on them because it is the best option for us at the moment. I never really liked them when I first got on them either. That was awful, they made me feel like crap, and I would have to eat all the time to feel okay, so yeah, like some women, I gained like fifteen pounds. It sucked. But here I am, five years later, still taking them, and never missed a day. I think it interferes with my sex drive though. I would love to see how I am off of them, but that will have to wait until we buy our house. I did some research and came across the Standard Days Method (SDM). Its a fairly easy way of determining which days you are most fertile. you can also buy Cycle Beads to help you count your cycle, which has color coded beads to let you know which certain days those are. Research says its 95% accurate, but as you know, it varies. So I mentioned this to my husband and asked if we could try this after we move. He was a bit hesitant, and I think its because he would have to wear a condom a few days in the month. He says hes spoiled. Whatever, I think he can sacrifice that, since I sacrificed my health by taking those stupid pills for five years. Its not because of the fear of pregnancy, he wouldn't mind if it happened unexpectedly. So I was wondering, have any of you tried this method of birth control?